Dark Lordess

I'm just wondering, when are we going to start this again? :P

You had a few typos that could be easily fixed by spell check. "It took me ages to write Wishing you were Somehow here Again !" moaned Skye. I think ...

This has a good storyline. Your sentence structure, however, needs some variation. They are all short sentences. It sounds choppy when you read it. Try combining some sentences. It sounds ...

Hey Goldie More ideas instead of dropping out - He's a gardener. He could be a healer. (You know with herbs or something) Every army needs a healer.

Hey Jules, are you still keepeing Beare too?

It sounds good but don't we need someone to play a bad character?

Shortest chapter? :P It's very good. Strick glared at her, "Nothing!" he said in a sof but icy voice. soft I thought you did fine with dialogue tags. You did ...

I like Jules idea too, or something along those lines. I really don't want to start over. I don't like rewriting.

I really liked the prologue at the beginning. I especially liked this line. The sun hid her face that morning in shame; some even ventured to say she never rose. ...

I definitely agree with Goldenheart. Sequals for books that are supposed to end happily ever after? They're supposed to stay that way!

Great story so far. :D “Still haven’t cured of you of your beastly accent have we.” you of your I really like the conversation with the gargoyle. :P Other than ...

This story has potential. :D I agree with Mad. You need to tell whats going on with all the people. I think you should describe the characters a bit more ...

Caroline B. Cooney Every single one of her books was about a hot chic meeting a hot guy and they'd fall in love and make out... and I'm not exaggerating. ...

It was barely dawn when Seyla saw it. Galina’s hawk. The fool! What does Galina think she's doing here?! Seyla could have slapped her, the King's niece or not... Unfortunately, ...

I really like your storyline! It has a lot of good detailed descriptions too. :D I like your narrator/storyteller interruptions every so often. It makes your story unique. Actually, the ...